what might be, may not be

Sometimes we focus on things that might be, we see potential, we are inspired, we hope. In this time of hope, of potential, we dream, we day dream and we envision ourselves in a different place, we are transported. In this place of hope, we are focused on the if...if my dream; if my hopes come true, everything will be better. But what do we do if it doesn't come true? How do we regain balance? I am ever an optimist, I perennially live in a place of hope, of expectation that my dream of the future, my vision, my belief will come to be. Some folks say this is what is most important... what we believe, we will create, it will be....we are a self fulfilling prophecy. We are told; this is the secret. But sometimes it doesn't, at least not in the way I envisioned, or believed, or hoped. So was it false hope, was I kidding myself; was it an elaborate escape from current reality? Whatever it was, when the bubble bursts, and it occasionally does, I am simply exactly who I am, and where I am. And the oddest thing happens. I feel better. That seems counter intuitive. But when the daydream rules, I am not grounded in now, I am living in a vision. And sometimes it's just that, a vision. A daydream. A fantasy. It can't happen, it won't happen. At least right now. (maybe later...being ever the polly anna)...I am sad, I don't like to give up on dreams. My visions are a big part of me, but I need to be where I am. Maybe the dream is different, maybe I lost my way, thinking about what could be instead of thinking about what is. Every lost vision is a learning about what a true vision is. I don't really know, but I do know that losing a dream has brought me back to my now, and it has made me better. Focusing in now, I found (rediscovered) my optimism, my enthusiasm, my vision. My fantasy distracted me for a while. If that dream had come true I would be in a different place, but I am not. I am here and I need to do the very best I can, right now, right here. and maybe that is what needed to happen. but I love the part of me that dreams, it lands me in places I never thought I would be, and it can still take me to places I need to go.